Relationships, Instincts, and Sex with Dr. Sam E. Greenberg (5) and Lyndsey Fraser (9)
On this week’s episode of Enneagram IRL, Stephanie Barron Hall interviews Dr. Sam E. Greenberg, a sexuality researcher and therapeutic coach, and Lyndsey Fraser, a licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist. The conversation explores the intersection of the Enneagram and sexuality, particularly through the lens of dominant instincts—self-preservation, social, and sexual. The sexperts share insights from their professional and personal experiences on how these instincts influence sexual desire, relational dynamics, and communication in intimate relationships. They also discuss common misconceptions about sexuality, the impact of cultural conditioning, and offer practical advice for navigating conversations about sex with partners.
Dr. Sam E. Greenberg is a writer, researcher, and Enneagram coach, whose work focuses on sexuality and relationships. Sam’s research explores the intersection of Enneagram type and instinct with patterns of sexual desire and expression. Her research informs her approach to supporting clients in building fulfilling relationships and actualizing sexual potential. Sam has presented her research findings in the U.S. and abroad, and offers workshops on multiple aspects of the Enneagram and sexuality.
Lyndsey is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Sex Therapist, and an International Enneagram Association (IEA) Accredited Enneagram Professional. She has presented on the intersection of the Enneagram, relationships, and sexuality in various U.S. and international forums. She is one of the few sex therapists in the world working explicitly with the Enneagram, Lyndsey regularly makes guest appearances on podcasts and offers private and public presentations as an internationally recognized Enneagram “sexpert.” Over the years, her workshops on sexuality and the Enneagram have ranged from 2-day weekend workshops to 8 to 10-week-long groups. Lyndsey also has had a private practice for the last twelve years in South Minneapolis where she specializes in relationships and sexuality utilizing the Enneagram.
Join Dr. Sam and Lyndsey for their upcoming workshops:
A virtual Enneagram Type & Sexuality workshop on March 13th. Pre-sale available now through Feb 7 at this link HERE.
A full-day in-person workshop Enneagram & Sexuality for Transformed Relationships workshop on July 28th in Minnesota the day after the IEA International Conference. Pre- sale available now through March 31 at this link HERE.
🔗 Connect with Dr. Sam and Lyndsey!
📷Dr. Sam’s Instagram: @Ennea_gasm
💻Dr. Sam’s website: https://enneagramsexpert.com/
📷Lyndsey’s Instagram: @lyndseyfraserlmft
💻Lyndsey’s website: https://lyndseyfraser.com/
🎥Youtube: @lyndseyfraser
🔗 Connect with Steph!
📷 Instagram: @ninetypesco
🎥Youtube: @stephbarronhall
Here are the key takeaways:
How Lyndsey learned about the Enneagram and her type
How Sam discovered the Enneagram and her type
The three instincts and their influence on sexuality
Each instinct's approach to sex
The challenges each instinct might face
Common myths about sexuality and the Enneagram
Practical advice for enhancing sexual understanding for each dominant instinct
All individuals can benefit from understanding their own sexual scripts and normalizing conversations about sex
How to approach conversations about sex
Using a book as a discussion starter can create a structured and neutral space for these conversations
Recognizing that all forms of consensual sexuality are normal can help reduce shame and anxiety around sex
Resources mentioned in this episode:
The Joy of Sex: The Ultimate Revised Edition by Dr. Alex Comfort
Hot and Unbothered: How to Talk About the Sex You Really Want to Have by Jessa Zimmerman
Come as You Are by Emily Nagoski
Want to keep learning about the Enneagram? Grab Steph’s new book, Enneagram in Real Life! Find the book, ebook, or audiobook wherever books are sold.
This Week’s Guests Picks:
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Enneagram Resources for you!
Want to keep the conversation going? Join me on Instagram @ninetypesco to keep learning and chatting about how our types show up in REAL LIFE!
Learn more about subtypes! Download my free subtypes guide here.
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