A Few Things to Know About Sixes
If we’re not careful, the Enneagram archetypes can easily be treated as oversimplified stereotypes. Maybe you’ve already seen examples of this! This post is intended to give a little more clarity about Type Sixes— to dig deeper, highlight some things that you may not know, and break down common assumptions.
Sixes are really hard to capture in a post like this because different types of Sixes can be so incredibly different. I’ve done my best based on the Sixes I’ve worked with and everything I’ve learned and read about Sixes!
While Sixes are known to be natural troubleshooters, often their questions can be viewed as a product of being afraid or anxious. However, this may not always be the case. Their vigilant nature can really help to serve themselves and others in the most helpful ways. And it’s important that we don’t underestimate what Sixes can handle!
So what else could we be overlooking when it comes to Type Sixes? Let’s dive into it!
Quick note: This may not resonate 100% with every Type Six, and that is okay! As mentioned above, there are many individual differences within each Enneagram type. I want to emphasize that humans are complex, and it’s okay to not perfectly align with everything you read about your type. If you’d like to see what other Sixes have to say about this post, you can find it on Instagram right here. Join the conversation!
Alright, Let’s get into it!
Here are a few things to know about Enneagram Sixes!
Common Underlying Motivation
To be safe, secure, and in community
→ Sixes spend a lot of mental energy managing uncertainty. Sometimes, this is focused on physical safety, but it’s more often about financial security, overall well-being, relational safety, trust, etc. Sixes are vigilant about what might happen, and solving for or planning for those problems helps them feel safe. Looking for what might happen can propel 6s into doubting and questioning things (and depending on the 6, they might doubt or question themselves). Sixes are VERY hard to describe because they can be so different, depending on the subtype.
Consistently Avoiding
Being stranded without support or safety
→ Some Sixes avoid this by building strong relationships, checking in, finding connection, and planning what they might do if something goes awry. Other Sixes avoid this by showing strength (almost like they won’t be stranded if they don’t show they need people) or by moving assertively to control the situation.
You might not know that…
→ 6s aren’t always afraid or anxious. It’s more helpful to think of them as “aware” or “vigilant.” This doesn’t always mean these ideas takeover: sometimes it’s like a tape running in the back of their minds.
→ Many 6s explain that they think in flow charts or binder tabs: they have a mental system of organizing their thoughts. Often, systems, procedures, and processes help them feel prepared and ready to take on the day!
→ In the face of a crisis, 6s are often courageous: sometimes they can be bold, and sometimes they can navigate away from the crisis to keep themselves and others from being impacted. When people learn the Enneagram, they sometimes think “6s are so anxious, I’m not going to honestly tell them what’s going wrong because they can’t handle it.” But they can ABSOLUTELY HANDLE IT. And the worst thing for a lot of 6s is dishonesty because it reinforces the narrative that they need to be suspicious of others.
→ 6s are often more competent than they let on! When seeking to feel sure, they might already have a thought or opinion about something. Seeking reassurance is aimed at feeling more certain than uncertain (not necessarily about forming a new opinion).
→ Sometimes, a 6’s awareness means they know what’s not being taken care of, so they jump in and take responsibility. This can be really exhausting, especially when they feel they’re the only one who is taking care of things.
→ Many 6s have a knack for bringing people together and building community. They can be really connective, expressive, witty, fun, and even sometimes spontaneous!
And BTW…
→ Concern about safety/security is not necessarily about finding fire exits. Sometimes, fear is focused on physical safety, but it’s more often about financial security, overall well-being, relational safety, trust, etc. A lot of the time, 6s are looking to feel sure, even if they already have a thought or opinion about something. They might seek reassurance from others, from an authority, from information, principles, ethics, etc., but all of this is aimed at feeling more certain than uncertain.
